The following photographs are scans taken from a day trip to the Isle of Wight sometime in the late 1990s. If I had to guess, I’d say 1997, but a year either side is possible. Obviously, with this being many decades ago now and there being no such thing as a timestamp saved to the contents of the Truprint folder from which the original photographs were unearthed, a lot of the details and the order of events of the day aren’t known for certain. I can recall that my wife’s parents were spending a week on the island we affectionately know as the Pile of Shite when we decided to pop over to accompany them for a day’s exploration. I suspect the locals don’t take the nickname in quite such an affectionate manner but, honestly, it’s got some quite nice areas and we really should take advantage of our proximity to explore it more.

While the in-laws had needed to use the car ferry to get from Portsmouth to the Isle of Wight (on account of them taking their car, you see) we had no such limitation with the mode of transportation available and, because we’re children at heart and because it’s the best way to get there, we took the hovercraft. And why wouldn’t you? If you’re just visiting the Isle of Wight for a short trip (which is all you’ll ever need) then pick the way to get there that involves rapidly spinning propellers deafening you and a massive curtain of air bouncing you across the Solent. It’s better than I’m making it sound.

At Ryde we were met by the relations and set off to see some Wight sights. As we were all fans of seeing historical sites – we all still are – we headed first for Osborne House, former summer home for Queen Victoria and Prince Albert. Built in the mid-nineteenth century in the Italian Renaissance style with design input from Prince Albert, the location was chosen as the views from this part of the Isle of Wight across the Solent reminded Albert of the Bay of Naples. Having been to Naples on a couple of occasions now I can attest to the fact that drugs were obviously readily available to the royals of Victoria-era Britain.

As it was cloudy when we first arrived we visited the house to start with. Victoria liked Osborne a lot, spending time at the house several times a year both before and after Albert died. Victoria died in Osborne House in 1901 after which her son, King Edward VII, who’d never liked the building, gifted it to the state. At the time of our visit we weren’t permitted to take photographs inside Osborne (this policy has now changed) but if we had then you might have sympathised with Edward. Gaudy doesn’t even come close to the impression we had. Taste is a very subjective thing, but wow!

By the time we’d emerged from Osborne’s eye-aching interior the day had brightened up considerably and we were presented with some lovely views. Still not very Neapolitan, though.

During our time at Osborne we also took a horse-and-cart ride to see the Swiss Cottage. This building had been deconstructed, transported from Switzerland, and rebuilt in the grounds specifically for the royal children to play in. In addition, the children were given plots of land in which to grow produce and sell them to their father as a means to teach economics. I can’t imagine why Edward didn’t like the place.

From Osborne House on the north coast of the Isle of Wight we then drove across to the west side of the island to see the landmark that is The Needles. These are chalk stacks, in some ways reminiscent of the basalt stacks off southern Iceland, although, since these are English natural formations and not Icelandic ones there is no myth about them being trolls turned into stone. The name of the three stacks derives from a fourth stack that has since collapsed into the sea and which was somewhat needle-shaped; something that can’t be said for those that remain. The Jaggedy Toothy Things doesn’t quite have the same ring to it as The Needles, though.

While you could just simply admire the views from the cliffs and down to Alum Bay (where you can pick up coloured sand souvenirs) there are some activities that can be undertaken at The Needles and on this visit to the Isle of Wight we did just that. Firstly, there was a chairlift for those who didn’t want to hurl themselves off the cliff edge and trust to the softness of the sand below (other routes down may have been available). We’re fond of a chairlift, and even if the one on the Isle of Wight doesn’t quite have the altitude and distance to travel as that we rode on up the Osorno Volcano in Chile, there’s still something magical about flying out over the top of a cliff with a view to the sea, and it’s a recommended experience.

Even though this day trip to the Isle of Wight took place almost a decade before we got married and enjoyed our first cruise you can tell the love of being on the water was there from early on in our relationship (well, we are both Portsmouth people, after all) as the next thing we did was hop on a boat to get out closer to The Needles. This also brought us some lovely close-up views of the Needles Lighthouse and we do like a nice lighthouse. The one off the west coast of the island dates from the nineteenth century although some form of navigational warning beacon had been present in the area almost a century earlier. Fully automated now, it was also fully automated back then too, although it had been one of the last three lighthouses in the country to be manned, said men (or women) having last served in the structure in 1994.

There isn’t a huge amount to see and do on the Isle of Wight but we have neglected it as a place to explore and we really must make the effort to get over there again and do so. I’ll add it to the list.

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